


The Purrfect Tea-Time

by Le_purple



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Cake, Cat Cafés, Cats, Childishness, Cute, F/F, Fluff, Tea, Tea Parties, Trolls on Earth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-10
Updated: 2019-11-10
Packaged: 2021-01-26 22:01:37
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21381280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Le_purple/pseuds/Le_purple
Summary: Nepeta and Aradia go to a cat cafe.
Relationships: Nepeta Leijon & Aradia Megido, Nepeta Leijon/Aradia Megido
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	The Purrfect Tea-Time

"EEEEE! Aradia I'm so exited! I can't BELIEVE I only just heard of this!" Nepeta chittered, the pair practically skipping down the street, hands locked together.

"I'm so glad that there's actually one near us!" Aradia agreed, approaching the glass doors with Nepeta. The cafe was one of the larger buildings in the city, with no second floor to speak of but an expansive ground floor. Nepeta opened the first set of doors and waited for Aradia to enter before closing it doing an awkward shuffle to open the other set of doors as the sign instructed.

The inside was decorated entirely with cats in mind and nothing else. There were shelves and holes in the walls, giant pillars of ropes, cat towers and the most cat toys Nepeta had ever seen in her life! The furniture was also cat themed, with dozens of pillows and soft chairs, the ones against the walls connected to a network of panels and beams for the cats. While Nepeta was foaming at the mouth in excitement, Aradia calmly approached the (also cat themed) counter and asked about their reservation, paying and pulling Nepeta along, ascending a small set of stairs, cats toddling along and trotting past an enthusiastic Nepeta, who was grinning widely.  
"So what do you want?" Aradia asked, sitting down on the soft blue sofa and picking up the ordering tablet on the table to swipe through the pink menu.

"I want the kitty's!" Nepeta replied wistfully, trying to entice a fluffy, grey cat through a hole in the wall, the feline just blinking at her before turning away, leaving Nepeta heart-broken.

"I don't think they serve purrbeast meat here." She replied, still swiping through. "They sure have a lot of sandwiches...oh and a ton of cake!"

"Mmm! Let me see!" Nepeta climbed over until she was practically sitting on Aradia's lap, trying to get a better look at the colourful screen.

"No cake yet! Choose a sandwich or a wrap or something first. I'm thinking about doing the meal deal so it's a sandwich or something, a cake and a drink. "

"Boo! Okay..." Nepeta huffed, scanning the menu. "...tuna melt!" Aradia added the panini to the order with her halloumi wrap.

"Do you want to share some tea?" Aradia asked, scrolling past milkshakes and mocktails.

"Of COURSE!"

"Ok...cake time!"

"Wow there's so many!" Nepeta gasped, eyes wide as she read the descriptions of each one. "Rocky road, purrease!"

"How could I saw no to those eyes?" Aradia giggled, complete the order with her mint chocolate cake before setting the tablet back.

"It's kitty time!" Nepeta burst, rolling off Aradia and scouting out any nearby cats. There was a black and white cat with a pink nose play-fighting with a fluffy calico, the calico uninterested as the black and white cat attempted to wrestle her. Nepeta tried to join the anticlimactic brawl, grabbing a nearby feather and dragging it across the floor in a slow, sweeping motion. This quickly caught the attention of the more playful cat, as he began to leave the poor calico alone and batted at the feather, rolling onto his back and pulling at the feather with his front paws, the cute, black pads curling around it as he stretched out.

Completely enamoured with the small creature, Nepeta began pulling the feather around, bopping the bridge of his nose before rolling it down to his tummy, the cat squirming and writhing. The cat curled around her hand, little teeth biting at her skin, Nepeta playfully rocking the cat back and forth, the feline pulling his head back before biting down again. She giggled as he drummed his back paws against her wrist as if he was trying to gore her like a mouse, his pupils wide and his mouth clamping down on her knuckles.  
"Ma'am, please don't be rough with the cats." The waitress warned, setting down the tea set and two plates.

"Aw...sorry." Nepeta muttered, sliding her hand out from the cats grip and leaving him the feather to gnaw on. The troll sat up on the long couch with Aradia, scooting forward until her knees met the small wooden table.  
"Woah! Aradia you're so popular!" She remarked, looking over to her. Aradia was surrounded by cats, a long, sleek black cat on her lap; the calico from earlier bumping her arm with his cheek, purring loudly; a thick-furred ginger cat wrapped around her neck on the top of the couch; and a rag-doll cat curling around her legs, every feline purring loudly.

"I know!" Aradia giggled, trying to split her attention among all the cats. "I don't really know how I'm going to eat with all of these little guys though, they'll probably steal my food."

"Pbpb! Shut up, you're so lucky! Cats never come to ME." Nepeta leaned over to her plate and picked up her panini, brushing away the small side salad before biting into it. Nepeta hummed in surprise, not expecting the warm cheese and tuna to taste so good, the panini soft with a crunchy outside.  
"M'ah gog! It a'sh sho 'ood!" Nepeta squeaked, looking at Aradia with wide eyes, mouth full of food.

"Nepeta, the purrbeasts!" Aradia warned, all the cats that were smothering her padding over to Nepeta at the smell of warm tuna. Nepeta giggled and held her panini up high to try and evade the loudly trilling cats.

"Sorry about that." An employee said, starting to pull the cats off Nepeta and putting them on the floor, the felines trotting away indignantly. "Put the net over everything you're not eating, the cats'll try to eat everything."

"Ok, thanks." Aradia leaned over and picked up her own plate, tucking the salad into her wrap before biting in with a crunch, the mayo and guacamole squishing in her mouth as the firm halloumi split.  
"You're righ'! 'e foo' 'ere is SO 'ood!"

"These naughty little purrbeasts seem to think so too! Isn't that right?~" Nepeta said, scratching the chin of a very pleased looking tabby. "But none for you, sir. No no no~! You can't have any of this!" Nepeta took another bite.

"Nepeta, stop teasing the poor purrbeast."

"But he's sooooo cute!"

"I know but he won't be when he tries to steal your panini...well what's left of it." Aradiaa giggled.

"Hey, it's a good samich! And this little guy is gonna have to fight me for it~!" Nepeta leaned down further and pressed her nose against the cats forehead, sliding down until the tabby gently headbutted her, Nepeta instantly falling in love...again.

Nepeta slapped the end of her panini onto her plate and batted at the arm of the couch, the cat taking the hint and jumping up to join her. She instantly began smothering the cat in affection, rubbing his cheeks and chin, scratching behind his ear, and paying extra attention to the base of his tail. The cats butt lifted up, head on its side and resting on the arm of the couch. The troll rubbed her face into the cats side, nuzzling into the warm fur and feeling the purr around her head.

"Nepeta, watch this." Nepeta hesitantly pulled away from the warm cat, still petting him as she looked over. The teapot was glass, and beside it was a tea strainer and a green sphere about the size of a chicken nugget.

"What is it?" She enquired, watching the green thing closely as Aradia dropped it into the steamy water, quickly putting on the glass top. After a few moments, the denseness of the sphere loosened, and green tendrils began to peel off, white strings falling away from the compact edges.  
"Woah...is it like those little blocks of teas the English humans had a couple hundred years ago?"

"Mmmm...even better! Just keep watching, Nepeta, you'll think it's amazing."

"...can you give me a hint? It's kinda slow." Nepeta asked impatiently, still petting the cat.

"....swamp."

"....swamp?" Nepeta repeated, slightly disgusted.

"It was...the first thing I could think of."

"Aradia, I know you like frogs but-" The two laughed a little together, Aradia blushing and feeling a little embarrassed.

"Pfft-ok just keep watching."

Nepeta looked back at the tea and started noticing that the deep green tendrils began to separate, revealing tinges of burgundy, Nepeta's eyes going wide.

"It's so purretty! And it has our colours!" Nepeta dive-hugged Aradia, wrapping her arms around her waist and squeezing her tight.

"Haha I'm glad you like it! I hope it tastes good!"

"Yeah, and not like swamp."

"YOU taste like a swamp."

"You would know." Nepeta teased, Aradia sticking out her tongue before leaning forward and swirling the tea pot.

"Nepeta, can you eat the rest of your panini before the purrbeasts get it?"

"I'll fight them for it." Nepeta said, mouth already full of tuna melt panini.

"You wouldn't fight a purrbeast."

"Yeah I would! An' I'd be awesome at it too and become the leader of their clan!"

"You've been reading too many of those human 'barbarian purrbeast' books haven't you?"

"Gno I habn't!"

Aradia set Nepeta's cup down in front of her, letting the tea strainer drip for a few seconds before placing it on her own mug. Before drinking it, Nepeta pulled her face close and examined it, pushing her plate to the side so she could get an EXTRA good look. The tea was a dark yet translucent lime colour, with specs of the flower drifting around and settling at the bottom of the glass mug. Although the scent did have floral notes, it smelled overwhelmingly herbal and fresh, like green tea! Nepeta grabbed the mug, cautious of the hot glass a she put it to her lips and took a sip. The flavour was gentle in her mouth and tasted like a richer chamomile, with a pinch of subtle green tea, but the drink had a very distinct taste overall that she couldn't place. Could this be the beverage that would put the tea connoisseur in her place?! No, but it tasted REALLY good.

"Wow." Aradia crooned, eyes shut as she enjoyed the tea.

"Yeah~" Nepeta agreed. Her haze was quickly broken by a cat padding along her lap, the tabby she had previously been petting growing impatient and taking matters into its own hands...paws.  
"Oh hello again! Sowwy for ingowing you!"  
She set her mug down and held her hands out for the cat, who's mouth parted and let out a loud purr as they brushed their cheek against her fingers. Instantly Nepeta rubbed its cheeks, chin and behind their ears before holding the cuddly cat close and kissing them. Aradia also joined in, scratching the base of their tail and watching Nepeta practically smother the poor purrbeast in love.

"Enjoy your cake." A waitress said, setting down two plates of immaculately cut cakes and taking the empty plates.

"So pretty~!" Nepeta gawked, pulled her face away from the cat to ogle the clean-cut marshmallows and chunks of chocolate, in the thick, coco sponge, a clean line of cookie cream separating the top and bottom, the slice topped with a shiny chocolate glaze, whipped cream, and more marshmallows. Aradia's cake was less flashy and more...minimalist. The cake was dark, top and bottom split by clean white line with a light green tinge, the top having a similarly shiny glaze to Nepeta's and a dollop of cream with a thin chocolate wafer on top.

"I almost feel bad about eating this...almost." Aradia joked, grabbing the tiny spoon and watching the surface of the shiny glaze break as she dug in. It tasted of a rich, deep chocolate that filled her mouth with warmth, but with a pinch of sweet mint and a soft cream. Aradia smiled and shut her eyes, toes curling in her shoes, Nepeta watching her cute reaction with a warm expression.

"Good?" Nepeta asked, smiling and still running her hands along the cats back.

"So good!~" Aradia squeaked, nodding her head before she held out her spoon, loaded with another bite. "Wanna try some?"

Nepeta leaned over and took the spoon in her mouth, pulling away and processing the flavour with a very serious expression, before fazing into her usual wide-eyed look.

"Mmm! That's good! I wonder what mine tastes like." Nepeta took her own spoonful and felt the cake melt in her mouth. It was so sweet and chocolatey! She could feel the crunch of cookie pieces against the snap and squish of chocolate and marshmallow, with the warm gooey-ness of the dense cakes.  
"Oh my gog, Aradia try some!"

Like Nepeta did, Aradia took the spoonful of the cake in her mouth, savouring the sweet flavour and different textures.

"Wow that's really good!" Aradia noted.

"I know! I hope this little wriggler doesn't think the same."

"It'll be fine, purrbeasts don't like cake...I hope."

Luckily for the pair, the tabby was uninterested with the deserts, but still pried for Nepeta's attention by rubbing their face against her arms and purring loud enough to deafen her. The troll tried her best to pay equal attention to the slice of cake and the cat, rubbing their cheeks and running her hands along their fur.

"Are you struggling?" Aradia giggled, watching Nepeta switch from cat, to cake, to cat, to cake.

"Yes-no-yes? Can you pet the purrbeast too?"

"And be distracted from my food?"

"Aradia-please!"

"Ok, ok." Aradia set her half-eaten cake down on the table and reached for a toy mouse, holding it by the tail and dangling it in front of the cat. It took a few seconds for the cat to grow distracted, the kitty's eyes dilating as they locked onto the toy. The tabby slowly padding along the pairs legs and the couch until Aradia drew them to the couch's arm before throwing the toy, the cat instantly lunging after it.

"Thanks." Nepeta sighed, returning to her cake.

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot." Aradia began, Nepeta looking over with a mouth full of cake. "I have a surprise for you after we've finished eating."

"Shurprise?"

"Yep! But don't rush, we have plenty of time"

Aradia poured herself and Nepeta another cup of tea, the mix of chocolate, mint and tea an odd sensation on her palate.

"So...what kind of surprise is it?" Nepeta purred, trying to look sultry as she licked her spoon.

"Pff-not that kind of surprise...yet."

"Then what is it?"

"I don't know. What do you think it is?"

Nepeta sat back with her mug and pondered for a second, Aradia looking into her childishly wide eyes as if she could see the gears turning in her head.

"I'll give you a hint: purrbeasts."

"Aradia, we can't have another purrbeast, Pounce doesn't get along with other cats. Wow, I never thought that I would be the one to say that."

"Psh! I'm not stupid. It's something else."

"Mmm...purrbeasts..." Aradia took another bite of her cake, watching Nepeta think like it was a TV show. "Can't you just tell me!"

"You'll find out eventually."

"Aradia please!" Nepeta begged, giving her matesprite The Eyes. "I'm DYING here."

"I'm sorry babe, you'll just have to wait." Aradia apologised, holding out a spoonful of rocky road cake, Nepeta somehow still giving her The Eyes as she took the spoon into her mouth and ate the yummy cake.

"Aradia..."

"Nepeta..." Aradia mimicked, Nepeta turning away and huffing like a child. Aradia sat back and sipped on her tea, casually crossing her legs and watching the cats run around, one of them climbing up pole wrapped up in rope. Nepeta turned her head and noticed that Aradia wasn't paying attention to her before quickly turning away again. The process was repeated a few times before the troll eventually gave up and laid back on Aradia's legs, head facing upwards and still giving Aradia The Eyes.

"Tell me." She whined.

"Nope."

"Tell me. Tell me tell me tell me!"

"Nope."

"Please please please please please!"

"Finish your food and you'll find out what the surprise is."

As quick as lightning Nepeta jetted up, nearly knocking the tea out of Aradia's hands. She quickly picked up her plate which held what was left of her cake and began scooping pieces of it into her mouth, quickly realising that she had put way to much in as she closed her mouth, Aradia watching in amusement.

"You might want to slow down there, love." Nepeta glared at Aradia before swallowing, feeling the sweet mush force its way down her throat. To remedy this, Nepeta grabbed her mug and took a few gulps, the subtle flavour of the tea washing down the chocolate and marshmallow. With the next bites of cake Nepeta was a lot calmer and more restrained, making sure that the spoon wasn't piled so high that she couldn't fit it in her mouth. Aradia took this time to finish her own cake, snapping the mint chocolate wafer in her mouth and feeling the crunch of the crystallised mint chunks, washed down by a sea of chocolate.

"When can I see the surprise?" Nepeta asked excitedly.

"After I've paid. Remember to drink your tea." Aradia reminded, grabbing the tablet and inserting her card into the card reader. Nepeta poured herself the last few drops of the tea, looking at the clump of leaves and petals at the bottom of the glass teapot as she drunk.

"Drink your tea Aradia! I wanna see the suuurpriiise!"

"Fine, fine." Aradia placated, tipping back her mug and drinking the rest of the tea in one gulp before setting it down again and grabbing Nepeta's hands, pulling the girl up so that their faces nearly touched.  
"I'll take you to your surprise now."

"'Take you'?" Nepeta pondered, Aradia pulling her along until they stopped at another double set of glass doors, a member of staff standing by.

"Can I see your entry tickets?" The employee asked, Aradia showing her two purple tickets. "Enjoy your time!"

Nepeta, still oblivious, followed Aradia through both set of doors, looking around a little before it finally set in.

"EEEEEEE! Aradia!" Nepeta squealed, hugging Aradia's arm like she would never let go.

"I did think that you might like it." Aradia noted, taking her to one of the seats, the girl practically foaming at the mouth.

The room was filled with kittens! They were sleeping, playing, running around-Nepeta wanted to cry! It wasn't long before a tiny black kitten toddled up the the pair, two bright green eyes peeking up at them. The tiny black kitten made a soft 'meep'ing noise and Nepeta could've died on the spot! She instantly doubled over and kissed the kitten on their head, barely able to pet the tiny creature. The kitten bumped their head against her hands, purring as loudly as they could.

"You having fun, Nepeta?" Aradia asked, watching her matesprite practically melt.

"Aradia they're so cute." Nepeta whimpered, brushing her face all over the small creature.

"Are you crying?"

"You don't understand what I'm feeling right now."

Aradia giggled before walking over to a worker who was watching the room making sure that the kittens were alright, and she whispered something in her ear, Aradia walking back with something in her hand.

"Nepeta~" Aradia called, the troll looking over to her as she heard a rustling noise. Aradia had a small baggie full of treats! The kitten scampered out of Nepeta's arms and hurried over to Aradia, mewing at her feet. Aradia plucked one of the small treats out of the bag and held it a little too high, watching the kitten bat at it with their paw for a few seconds before she finally let the kitten have it, the tiny mouth and little white teeth closing around the treat, Nepeta able to hear the tiny crunch.  
"I'll let you take it from here." Aradia said, rustling the bag before throwing it to Nepeta.

A couple other mewing kittens scampered over to Nepeta, trying to get her attention as they climbed her legs, bumped their heads against her and pawed at her. The oliveblood could've fainted! She held out a treat for a tiny calico, but the other kittens approached her too, bumping into each other and trying to reach the treat. With some gentle nudging on Nepeta's part, the little calico at last able to eat the treat, the kittens looking up at her with big eyes.

What followed were a few blissful minutes of Nepeta feeding the tiny kittens their treats, Aradia watching as she peacefully pet the black kitten, taking away the treats after a while so Nepeta wouldn't over-feed them. Once the treats stopped, a couple of the kittens scampered away to run around or sleep, but Nepeta and Aradia smothered the kittens that stayed with attention, cuddling them and making sure that they were being gentle. The pair were in heaven, the sleepy kittens curling up against them, peacefully drifting in and out of sleep and purring gently.

"Um, excuse me," An employee began, the pair looking up at her "Your time is up in 2 minutes."

"Mmm'ok..." Nepeta moped, lifting her head up off Aradia's knee.

"We'll be out soon." Aradia said, the employee nodding and leaving them.

"Bye~ I'll miss you, little purrbeasts."

"It'll be fine, you'll see them again."

"I know but I'm gonna miss them..." Aradia lifted Nepeta up like she was a cat herself, the burgundyblood easily able to carry her bridal style before setting her on her feet. The pair glanced around to take one last look at the kitten room, Nepeta waving goodbye to them. She also waved goodbye to the cats in the cafe itself, Aradia barely able to usher her out.

"So was it good?" Aradia asked, the pair holding hands as they walked.

"Mhmm! It was purrfect!"

**Author's Note:**

> Aradia eating ass tonight.


End file.
